2)
"Where are you taking me...??" I asked a bit shaken. Silently the officer held my arm in his strong grip while he led me through a long gray hallway. It didn't seem like the "the oh-so talkative" officer was planning on speaking with me. Drowning away in my thoughts, I followed him through the gray hallway.
All sorts of music sounded throughout the streets. In my memory, I'm standing at the train station. People dressed in orange shirts are walking by while I make my way through the sliding doors. There are a few food stands stalled here and there. Lots of people with rugs filled with junk gathered from the attics are covering the streets. It is Queens day.
I make my way to the supermarket to fetch myself a can of soda. Then, amoung the crowd, I notice him standing there. I actually wanted to turn around and walk away. But somehow it felt like my feet were nailed to the grond. Mixed emotions rage through me as he makes his way through the crowd, making his way towards to me.
"Miss White!!" a high voice sounded, ripping me out of my haze. I rubbed my eyes as I tried to set my mind back into present time.
"Miss White!" the high voice sounded once more. A lady dressed in a dark blue suit sat across from me. She wore thin fashionable glasses and a blend of Estee Lauder perfume, baby oil, cocoabutter and a smell that reminded me of my old Surinamese aunt surrounded her.
The lady in the dark blue suit reached out her hand. "My name is Isabel Morgenstond. I am your lawyer and I will do my best to defend you." she said slightly enthusiastic.
I looked at her, wondering how many cases this woman had delth with before me. For some reason I always had the "luck" to be settled with a social worker fresh from school. Even if her intentions may be good, I wasn't expecting much real help from this lady dressed in her dark blue suit.
dinsdag 4 mei 2010
zaterdag 17 april 2010
The Vicious Cycle Grand Finale -- 1
1
I never thought that this sick vicious cycle in which he and I used to dance would end in such a way. Not that I never had a premonition, or nightmares of what might happen one day. Still, I somehow never expected it.
It's dark and cold. The gray walls that surround me are carved with white chalk stripes and ingenious phrases. The little amount of light that comes from the outside through a small window, illuminates the metal toilet that obviously hasn't been cleaned in a while.
Sitting on the stone cold floor with my back against the wall, my knees pulled close to my body and my hands folded under my knee pits, I cradle myself back and forth. Thoughts of insanity and vague memories are flashing by while holding my head between my knees. My heart is pounding in my throat and I'm hyperventilating.
"This isn't really happening... This isn't really happening...."
A vague surreal memory haunts me. We're siting in the living room, my boyfriend, our roommates and I. There's wine and snacks on the table. He and his friends are sitting around the table while I do the dishes. Their voices echoe, I somehow don't understand what they are saying. Everything is so blurry. I slowely reach for the top shelf where the wine glasses stand and grab one of them. Then I approach the table and I sit down and pour myself some wine.
He looks at me. I recognize the irritation in his eyes. I can feel my palms become sweaty as I carefully take a sip.
The flashback ends abruptly. Someones banging on the heavy door. I have trouble opening my eyes, it's like they're on fire.
I look up and all I see in a blur is a bright light filling the small space and a man in a uniform standing in the doorway.
to be continued...
I never thought that this sick vicious cycle in which he and I used to dance would end in such a way. Not that I never had a premonition, or nightmares of what might happen one day. Still, I somehow never expected it.
It's dark and cold. The gray walls that surround me are carved with white chalk stripes and ingenious phrases. The little amount of light that comes from the outside through a small window, illuminates the metal toilet that obviously hasn't been cleaned in a while.
Sitting on the stone cold floor with my back against the wall, my knees pulled close to my body and my hands folded under my knee pits, I cradle myself back and forth. Thoughts of insanity and vague memories are flashing by while holding my head between my knees. My heart is pounding in my throat and I'm hyperventilating.
"This isn't really happening... This isn't really happening...."
A vague surreal memory haunts me. We're siting in the living room, my boyfriend, our roommates and I. There's wine and snacks on the table. He and his friends are sitting around the table while I do the dishes. Their voices echoe, I somehow don't understand what they are saying. Everything is so blurry. I slowely reach for the top shelf where the wine glasses stand and grab one of them. Then I approach the table and I sit down and pour myself some wine.
He looks at me. I recognize the irritation in his eyes. I can feel my palms become sweaty as I carefully take a sip.
The flashback ends abruptly. Someones banging on the heavy door. I have trouble opening my eyes, it's like they're on fire.
I look up and all I see in a blur is a bright light filling the small space and a man in a uniform standing in the doorway.
to be continued...
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